Happy Father’s Day to all the dudes out there who love their kids!
I didn’t celebrate my dad yesterday. I don’t have a relationship with him. As in zero communication. Absolutely no relationship and I am 100% okay with that. We were both at my niece’s birthday party last summer and didn’t speak. It’s a crazy long story with so many twists and bumps. At some point I’ll write a post or two or ten about it.
We didn’t celebrate with Emerson’s dad yesterday. He has never met his dad and more than likey never will. His choice, not mine. The more I think about it the more I realize how okay with that I really am. He isn’t stable. He has some psychological issues. He has a criminal past. The list goes on and on. I also don’t want to share Emerson. Just the thought of not seeing him every day makes my heart hurt. I could never send my baby to ____’s house for the afternoon let alone the entire weekend. Again another topic that will be talked about in later posts!
Neither of those are what I want to focus on here. I kind of just want to rant and babble about things I thought about on Father’s Day.
After seeing a bunch of sweet Happy Father’s Day posts with some not so sweet “I hate my baby daddy” posts I have to admit that it really irritates me when women refer to their child(ren)s dad as a “sperm donor”…
sperm donor (spɜːm ˈdəʊnə)
a man who supplies sperm to be used in an artificial fertilization process.
Especially when the woman chose to sleep with the dude and/or have a relationship with him. He is not your child’s sperm donor. He is their biological father. Granted he may be a deadbeat or not in their life at all. This still does not make him your sperm donor.
It also irritates me when people say happy father’s day to single moms. I am a single mom, so I feel like I can talk about this.
I am NOT my son’s dad. I am not a man. I can never fill the roll of a father for him. So while I am doing the job of both parents, I am still just his mom. I can’t show him how to be a man. I can teach him how a man respects a woman. I can’t relate to him or give him advice when he goes through puberty. I will be sending him to his Uncles for those talks 😉
As a woman I cannot do everything a man can. I’m sure I’ll get some backlash for that!
We spent yesterday celebrating the one man who has always been a constant in my life. My Grandpa. I could go on and on about how wonderful and cute he is but I won’t.
*With my grandpa in 1989*
Some day I know Emerson will have an incredible man who will love him as his own and we will celebrate him. Until then we’ll spoil Gpa with chocolates and lasagna or is it lasagne?